The One I Did Not Want

It was not his words,

Nor his actions.

But simply the way he breathed,

That took my breathe away.

It was not how he looked like,

But the way he looked at me,

His sinking eyes

And his crooked smile.

The words that sunk beneath his skin,

Beneath that electrifying touch,

That made me shiver.

It wasn't the reverie 

That he put me in,

But the reality that he put out to me.

It was not the best in me

That he pulled out,

But my vulnerability

That he scratched out.

And it was not how much I wanted him,

But how much

I wanted to repel him.

Yet I couldn't.

Like a part of him resided in me,

Knocking me down from inside,

That i desperately wanted to pull out.

Yet I couldn't.

Because every time I tried,

It struck me with a creeping pain.

Like cutting a limb out of my body,

Burning down at my sight.